Stars & Bars Kimono Robe

The best

This star spangled slice of fried gold is so badass it deflected Hurricane Beryl away from my house and let us freedom TF on without all that nonsense. It’s now my go-to every morning and especially for the late night munchies DG runs, wink wink. Great robe, just gotta watch out that women around you don’t spontaneously find themselves with child, so wear responsibly.

This kimono is so soft and amazing. I wish I could have a breeze blowing it up as I walk. Just to make it look like a cape.

By far the greatest item of Americana clothing items I own, every time I put it on and I feel like I'm being hugged by old glory herself. The robe is so patrioticaly comfortable

I was not prepared for the shear amount of testosterone and raw patriotism that was going to flood my system once I put this kimono on. But let me tell you, I was not disappointed. When paired w/ my star spangled silkies, I was sure I’d single handily defeat communism. George Washington’s ghost appeared in my mirror and saluted me. Chuck Norris called me personally and invited to his ranch. And I received no less than 69 “Happy birthday, Mr. President,” texts from various numbers. As per usual y’all knocked it out of the park. I got star spangle hammered while wearing this on the Fourth and woke up w/ out a hangover🤷🏻‍♂️